Last October, I wrote this 100-word piece about something that I often think about now that I'm a parent: understanding my own parents' choices and learning to make them my own:
I grew up being fearful of new things and resistant to changes. My parents were strict; they didn't allow me to do many of the things my friends were doing, mostly out of a fear that I would get hurt. I admit I felt like an outcast many times. Now that I'm a mother, however, I understand my parents' desperate need to protect me from the unknown. My only hope is that I'm able to protect my children while at the same time giving them enough freedom to experience all the things that will help them become well-rounded adults.
I grew up being fearful of new things and resistant to changes. My parents were strict; they didn't allow me to do many of the things my friends were doing, mostly out of a fear that I would get hurt. I admit I felt like an outcast many times. Now that I'm a mother, however, I understand my parents' desperate need to protect me from the unknown. My only hope is that I'm able to protect my children while at the same time giving them enough freedom to experience all the things that will help them become well-rounded adults.
It's funny, but my mom was fairly permissive, and that's something I'm struggling to emulate since I feel we all turned out pretty well. Sometimes, I want to protect Li'l D, but then I remember how my mom let me and my siblings explore, figuring we'd learn more about ourselves and the world that way. So I try to stand back a little and watch Li'l D learn for himself, knowing that it may be hard for me . . . but that it's really, really wonderful for him. Then again, he's 20 months, and I was faced with new behavior today that reminds me I'm a baby parent myself! Who knows how I'll think about these things in three years? In five?
ReplyDeleteI need to let go a little, I know. My four-year-old will start preschool this fall, and after being with him 24/7 for all these years, I know I'll have a hard time entrusting his care to others. And preschool is just the beginning. It'll lead to so many things that I'm not ready for, things that will be hard for me but so good for him...
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